Another effect of words on us ....
“The Power of the Word”
{... HUH... This sounds exactly the same as what you have been blabbing about for the last God knows how long??!! }
Well, no. The Power of the Word here is not what most of you think. It means that the word may have an influence on you.
{OK ... you have totally lost your mind; it IS what you have blabbing about}
Again, well, no. Let me try to make it a bit clearer.
(To my Arab friends)
Do you remember that old movie, when there was this short guy that went to a hypnotist, and the hypnotist made him repeat a certain phrase? (ana mesh 2osayar 2oz3a, ana taweel w ahbal =D) which means: I'm not short and tiny, I'm tall and goofy.
I bet that that guy, after repeating that phrase for some time, finally believed that he really is tall (exclude the ahbal part =D).
A word you say to yourself, or another person, if said in a certain way, or repeated for some time, may be eventually believed.
It’s the same idea as, don't say “Can I Do this ", but say “I Can Do this "* . By telling yourself you can do something, you start believing that you can.
As much as this is a good thing, it’s an extremely dangerous thing too.
For instance, if I tell my friend, “You don't look good ", I might mean it as a joke, but the human brain doesn't take something and accept it as it is. The brain doesn't take the word and throw it at the back of the mind. No. The brain processes that word. And while you totally meant it as a joke, your friend will not take it that way. She'll start thinking,: " Well, when I wore this she said I don't look good, and before she pointed out that my mouth is asymmetric and before that she said that I had gained weight. And not only her, my other friends have been pointing out faults in my clothing ... ", and the human brain just never stops. In the end, a simple joke made a person's self image become destroyed.
I'm not saying don't joke (Hell, I'm the last to say so =D), but as long as the joke is clear and unrepeated, then it’s ok. Most important than repeating is to know who you are joking with. If this person is sensitive and already has a low self confidence, then don't just go joking around about things like that. KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE.
The Power of a Word can be so strong, that it may affect someone's life!!
When is that possible? When, for instance, you say it to a kid.
And again, I have some experience in that field.
My cousin has a daughter whose 9 years younger than myself. This girl was always criticized by her aunts and great aunts, and I have to admit that sometimes I criticized her too. This girl, ever since I can remember was criticized by everyone. The only one that was so sweet and caring with her was, my aunt, her grandmother. After a couple of years, she had a brother. He was cuter than her and funny. Everyone's attention turned to her brother and even worse, the criticism towards her was doubled. Soon after her grandmother died, and the only one left that showed her love was her dad. You will not believe it when I say that, even her mother criticized her and never took her side. This girl, at a younger age, was a very happy and playful child. All of a sudden, without any warnings, she transformed. She would not play with the other kids in the family; she would not joke around with everyone, and would come and sit in one place and not move or talk till they left. She started acting much older than her age hoping that this would satisfy everyone who’s been criticizing her. Seeing that, the people who used to criticize her are now trying to help her!! But it’s too late because the girl is scarred for life from their earlier non-stop criticism.
{Ok, that was one an example and on a kid, and of course kids believe everything.}
OK. Another example:
I was not in Egypt for the three prep years, so when I came back to 1st secondary, it was extremely hard to follow up with my friends, since lots of things were based upon the earlier knowledge, and specially Arabic. Anyways, when I started 2nd secondary, we were all terrified because simply I was totally lost in the Egyptian curriculum. I had changed schools and had missed a couple of lessons (I didn't take private lessons, instead I took school groups). On my first day, I found out I had a chemistry lesson!! You remember chemistry guys, this very weird subject that never seemed to be understood, and if you understand it then the information never stays in your memory. Anyways, I attended. And of course I was so darn scared, the first day in a new school and above that trying to catch up with my schoolmates. They all knew that teacher before and this was the first time for me to meet him. This man is the smartest man I ever met. In 5 minutes he made me feel home and confident. How? I really don't know. He would ask me questions about things he didn't explain yet and I would amazingly answer. On the first day, he had started telling me how smart I am, and even warned his star student that he has some competition. He was the first teacher that knew how to treat me. He kept building up my self confidence through the whole year. That didn't only affect my chemistry grade, it affect all my studies. He helped me through them all. And I was blessed with another teacher that did the same too, my Arabic teacher. This man, I really owe my life, both of them actually. Through encouraging words the whole 2 years, they made me pass them and with pretty good grades for my level when I first got there. I became the star student in most of my classes (God knows what happened to me now =S). And those words weren't made up or not true. They just knew when to compliment me and when not to. They wouldn't let me think too much of myself and yet don't under estimate my intelligence. They kept me balanced. (I’d be talking about them later in my blog, because that is a story to tell really)
So that was another example for how words can affect your future. And they did affect my future, cause till now, whenever I see them, they higher my self confidence and give me push of force towards working.
I guess now it very clear what words can do.
So people, seriously, think before you talk, you might end up losing everything.
“Watch your thoughts, for they become words.
Watch your words, for they become actions.
Watch your actions, for they become habits.
Watch your habits, for they become character.
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.”
*quoted from Hossam Aldin from his last article "Climbing Yourself"
